Have you tried and tried and tried and just still not been able to get the results you want? We all have in some way or another, right!

Is there a relationship you keep trying to make work but your friend, spouse, parent, child, or coworker just is not putting in the effort? Ever found yourself at a loss? Like what else can I do?

We worry and worry over the loss of that relationship or damage that we want to be sure never gets beyond repair. We toil and fret while they skip and go about their merry way.

At some point in some relationships, we have to let go and let God. I know – the cliche of all cliches but OMG this is sooooooo hard for me to do.

Confession time: I sometimes think…oh but surely I can talk them into this or that.(control) Or I think if only I had or hadn’t done this or that.(regret) Or I imagine the worst and try and problem solve just in case this or that. (worry) None of these thoughts are producing life in our relationships. So this is what I do and sometimes it feels like I can feel my brain shifting from one neuropathway to another.

When I catch myself swimming in regret, worry, or control, I jolt myself by talking to myself and saying, “Adrienne, what good is this doing?” If the answer is NONE, which is the case in times like this, I make an intentional choice to CHANGE what I’m dwelling on. Here are some things I try to do in order to beat out regret, worry, and shame. Try them:

1- I think of a verse that combats the specific thought and bring my thoughts in line with the Word & declare that Word over the situation.

2- I change my state and stand up or go for a walk, go to a different room, maybe even stretch or take a deep breath. This helps your mind and body get in motion to change.

3- I envision what the situation would look like completely resolved and declare what I see with eyes of faith instead of what I see on the surface.

4- I let go and realize the most I can do is pray for them and pray for myself, asking God to show me where I need to change my perspective or behavior. God is so faithful to do just that. I think this is part of the secret of humbling ourselves in the sight of the Lord and Him lifting us up. How that happens is often He lifts out mindsets and therefore lifts us up out of these messes we find ourselves in.

5- When I stop trying so hard and release the situation into the mighty hands of God, there is finally peace no matter if things change that I can tell or not. It’s at this point that we genuinely experience being happy ANYWAY.

This is true of relationships but also true of work or finances or anything. Stop trying in your own strength so hard and look to where your help comes from. His burden is light and His yoke is easy!

Lean on Me when you’re not strong and I’ll be a friend. I’ll help you carry on! I picture God singing that to me regarding some things I’ve been concerned with lately and so why don’t you do the same and let’s sing this song all week together!!!

Comment your prayer requests and let’s lean on each other too. I need you. You need me! And we can really make a difference in each other’s lives by being there for each other working through these things together! DM me on Instagram if you need further encouragement along these lines!

XO,

Happy Monday!

Adrienne Cooley

Register now with the EARLY BIRD SPECIAL for #HappyGirl21 here. • Check out all the resources at AdrienneCooley.com • Follow me on Instagram @addiecooley and like my Adrienne Cooley page and join my Facebook group • I hope to stay in touch and connect! • You really can be #happyANYWAY, #loveANYWAY & #believeANYWAY no matter what life throws at you!